The Sixties - Part IV - Serendipity

Tough Times Never Last But Tough People Do

In an earlier post I stated that our life has always been ruled by serendipity in a beneficial way. Mystical occurrences are commonplace and an invisible presence seem to follow and help us. For example, we never discovered how we got our first apartment and never discovered who recommended my husband for his job in the '50s as a lab technician.  We were blessed the way some things just kind of happened. We just went with the flow.

Twice in my life, it was expected that I was die.  The first time was in elementary school when I was ill with pneumonia.  It was June, the school year was almost over, so they took up a collection for flowers for my funeral, which was expected to be sometimes in July. The second time was in 1962, when pneumonia presented itself again. After spending three days in the hospital, I left, because the bills that were accumulating made me sicker. Somehow, I made it again.

After the birth of our third child, we were having financial problems.  Back in those days female teachers didn't take maternity leave because they wanted to, nor could you use sick days for pregnancy.  You had to leave in your fifth month and returned, with a doctor's note, when your baby was six months old. During that year of "leave" you received no pay so it was tough.

Neighbors, like the Wootens, used to bring us meals, claiming they had accidentally cooked too much food.  My sister, Susie, would accidentally buy too much food for her refrigerator and ask us to eat it so it wouldn't spoil.

Front Row: Sister Susie, who would bring food, Moody's sister, Martha

It was 1962, and Moody was a substitute teacher making $25 a day, our only income at the time, with no fringe benefits. He came home from work, and asked me how we were doing.  I told him that if we had $300 everything would be OK.  A moment later, the doorbell rang. It was a special delivery with a $300 check from his sister, Mary.  In the letter she wrote that she had been thinking of us and sent the check in case we needed something.

Moody, Martha, George, Mary, Joe, James, Horace, Albert

Seated is their Father, Professor Moody

One day, in August 1964, we were were over to a neighbor's house listening to his new stereo, which was high tech at the time. The neighbor wanted to hear my new Dinah Washington's album so I went home to get it. The phone rang while I was at home and I hesitated to answer it because I wanted to go back to hear the new stereo. Fortuitously, I lifted the receiver, and it was the Evanston School District, one of the best districts in the state, offering my husband a science teaching position.  Because it was so late in the school year, they were offering jobs to the first people they found at home.  I ran back to the neighbor's house, shouting the good news.  Suppose I hadn't answered that call?

In 1968, when my husband was a school superintendent in Harvey, Illinois, he was sitting at his desk while his secretary took lunch.  The telephone rang and he answered it. It was a wrong number. The caller was looking for someone in East Chicago Heights, and instead of hanging up, he identified the party for the caller and got the number for her.  They continued talking and the woman told him about her job, which was providing funds for people who needed grants.  Moody said, "That's ironic.  I'm looking for someone to fund my dissertation."

Well, before you knew it, he was on his way to New York to meet with Hylan Lewis, Dixie Moon, and Dr. Kenneth Clark, the psychologist who provided much of the research in the Brown v. Board of Education case that desegregated schools. It was a fruitful meeting and the Metropolitan Applied Research Center decided to fund his study to form the organization and help him complete his dissertation.

He wanted to study Black superintendents because there was zero research on the topic. Therefore, his dissertation had no review of the literature, usually a very vital part of a study.  At the time there were less than twenty in the entire country, all of them male in Black districts.  He was keeping a roster as he traveled to meetings around the country. His idea was to form an organization, the National Alliance of Black Superintendents that eventually grew to include all Black educators, the National Alliance of Black Educators (NABSE) that at its peak had over 10,000 members. (More about the organization in later posts.) This happened because he was nice to someone who dialed the wrong number.

We try not to dwell on disaster.  He sees the glass as half full and I see the glass as half empty. I began to tip over to his side when I heard a speaker in Tulsa.  She told the story about a young man who fell into the river after his boat tipped over.  He could not swim and was in danger of drowning.  His father, who also could not swim, watched in agony while standing on the shore.  He found a rope, threw it to his son, and began to reel him in.  The young man clutched the rope and as he began to pull, noticed there was a break in the rope.  Danger still awaited.  He yelled to his father and asked him what should he do. His father examined the rope, shouted to his son to reach beyond the break, which he did, and the father hauled his son to safety.

Dedication of Martin Luther King, Jr. School

That sort of summarizes our life.  We try to reach beyond the breaks.

Hard Times Will Make a Monkey Eat Pepper and Swear It's Sweet

The Sixties - Part III

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy,

they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.  ~Marcel Proust

My speed (or drug of choice) was racing with my sister, Mary.  She drove a Buick and I drove a Cadillac, both with BIG engines.  We wouldn't think of driving with only six cylinders.

This is my sister, Mary with her husband, who raced with me.

My mother, in front of the Cadillac I would use to race

We each had three children and after midnight, we would load the kids into our respective cars, leave our husbands at home, and find a lonely stretch of road on the far south side of Cottage Grove Avenue.  We would wait at a red light and at the first inkling of the light changing to green, we would literally push the pedal to the metal.  The first person to reach the next red light would win the race.  Our children, in the back seats, with no seat belts, would jump and cheer us on as we would race over 100 mph on a CITY STREET.  We were crazy and didn't even know it, but it was fun.  Can you imagine that happening today?  What was the most foolish thing you did in your twenties?

On all family road trips, I was the chief driver, and I was always trying to set a record. We didn't worry about gas mileage because a gallon of gasoline only cost between 30 and 35 cents. The children preferred my driving because they liked speed, also, and Daddy drove too slowly and carefully for them.

My mother had a large old-fashioned porch.  It was not unusual to find at least ten of us sitting on the porch on any given day. The children waited for the ice cream truck and we hoped that my Mom was cooking dinner.  As neighbors walked by, everyone spoke.  It was like living in a small town.

Once, and only once, I took Moody to the Opera House to see Boris Godunov.  Since it was our first trip to the opera, I borrowed clothes from my sister, so I could look like I belonged. He slept through most of the opera and I awoke him during intermission so we could go buy a drink.  In the lobby we saw his former ROTC Colonel and his wife.  Mrs. Ray was very elegant; she had a diamond pin on a sleek, black silk dress.  Every hair was in place and her make-up was impeccable.  Colonel Ray was tall, dark, and handsome in his black suit and stiff white shirt.  They looked like they belonged.

We exchanged greetings and Mrs. Ray asked if we were "patrons of the opera."  While I tried to compose some reply that didn't sound provincial, Moody responded.  "No," he said.  "We're just here because we have free tickets.  This dude started dying in the first act.  Every time I think he is about to die, he jumps ups and sings another song.  Will this guy ever die?"  Stunned, everyone just looked at him and smiled.  In 1989, when we traveled to Russia, we saw a statue of Godunov in a museum.  I pointed it out to him, saying, "Look, Moody, your opera."  "Well," he responded, "that guy finally died."

As popular culture changed so did the music. The music of Motown flooded the country and many teenagers formed groups, sang on corners, and waited for Barry Gordy to discover them.  Motown is credited, by many, with helping music to "crossover."  Before, Blacks listened to so-called race music on Black stations and white radio stations did not play Black music. Some Black music could only be played on white stations if the song had been "covered" by a white group.  The sixties changed that.

We loved our parties

The new music meant new dances.  Boy, did we dance during the sixties. The Twist started the rage in non-contact dancing.  You could dance with a partner or dance alone.  No one cared. There was the Mess Around, the Hucklebuck, the Fly, the Watusi, the Stroll, the Mashed Potato, the Hitchhike, the Monkey, the Chicken, the Jerk, the Stroll, and many more.

This is a picture from the Snowstorm of the Century, January 1967.  This storm provided the biggest disruption of the city since the Chicago Fire of 1871. A record 23 inches of snow fell, with drifts of over 6 feet.  The city was paralyzed with the airports, schools, and many business closed. Cars and buses were abandoned.  My husband could not get home from Evanston but I made it home. Evelyn Gay's husband brought friends and literally picked up our cars in the parking lot at our school and placed them into "ruts" so we could make it home.  The drive home was terrifying.  You didn't dare leave the ruts because you would get stuck in a drift.  A fifteen minute trip took almost an hour. Once I arrived home, neighbors gathered to determine what food each of us had and how we could share to make sure no one was hungry.  A few of us trudged up to 95th Street, looking for any open store and buying any staples we could find.  This is truly one of those times when you had to be there to appreciate it.

Our life has been filled with contrasting images. One benefit of the '60s (for us) was the rich man we met who used to fly us first class across the country to integrate parties and dinners. We stayed in fancy, five star hotels and had a driver at our disposal.  He lived in a fabulous home in the Bay Area Hills and he introduced us to a life we only knew about in the movies.  Riding in a limo after being shot at in Mississippi can jar your senses.  Which is real? Having cocktails in a home that overlooked the bright lights of the city before being chauffeured to a five star restaurant to eat foods we didn't even know existed can awaken your awareness.  We had no idea how large the gap was between the rich and the poor. It strengthened our resolve to do more for others, especially in the field of education.

Husband with two of our children, 1961

L. to R. -  Sisters Mary and Evelyn, Betty, and Valjean

During this decade we began a soon to be life-long experience of bringing other children into our home and working with young people on an individual basis.  They call it mentoring now.  I wish I had kept count of the number of children who call us Mom and Dad. We wanted to adopt a couple of my eighth graders but were told that we were too young and already had three children.  So, we did the next best thing.  They just came when they could and we helped when we could.  We didn't know that our mentoring would increase exponentially in the next three decades.

Article in paper when I worked in Park Forest

On June 20, 1969, we took the children fishing with my sister, her husband, and their children.  It was a relaxing, carefree day.  In early evening, we rushed home to sit in front of our television to see something President Kennedy had asked Americans to do.  We watched with disbelief as Americans walked on the moon.  It was riveting. The entire country was enthralled as new heroes were born. My mom, and she was not alone, refused to believe that they were on the moon.  She said they were televising this from Wyoming or Montana.

One of the most dynamic decades was winding down.  We didn't realize it but our time in Chicago was coming to an end.

Bookends of the '60s:

Kennedy and Nixon;

cold war and real war;

segregation and integration;

black and white television and color television;

talking about space travel and traveling to the moon;

back of the bus and anywhere you want to sit;

colonialism and independence;

race music stations and music on all stations

Relationships are all there is. 

Everything in the universe only exists because it is in relationship to everything else.

The Sixties- Counterculture Part II

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal."

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

There was so much going on in the '60s.  It was like a crazy quilt and trying to make sense of the decade can be mind boggling.  We witnessed a shared history that was filtered by our life's experiences.  To some the decade of the sixties was all about rock and roll, drugs, and free love (helped along with the pill) as a protest to conservatism and social repression of earlier years.

To others it was the rise of feminism: burning bras, ditching restrictive girdles, and trying find a ladder to climb up and break the glass ceiling. Others spent part of the '60s protesting and marching against the war in Vietnam, leading to the downfall of President Johnson. Still, others were immersed in the civil rights movement, marching, sitting in at lunch counters, and riding the bus to freedom.  It was an exciting and radical decade.  Somehow many of these causes, while separate, intersected and built to a huge crescendo by the end of the decade. Remember the 1968 Democratic Convention in Chicago?  That was wild.

My Aunt Osie in the 60s

What did we do during the 60s?  We missed the wild side of the sixties. I was never a flower child, we didn't do drugs, and didn't go to Woodstock.  Our chief focus was the civil rights movement, raising our young family, and working hard to achieve the so-called American Dream.  However, we were like Rosa Parks, tired of being at the back of the bus. The seminal event of the '60s to us was King's March on Washington where he delivered his prophetic I Have A Dream Speech.

Rosa Parks was one of the gentlest women I've ever met.  She was also composed and friendly.

We were old enough to understand the power and passion of his speech, and young enough to have hope and optimism for the future.  We were on the cusp of a new way of life for Black Americans. Our parents, who were born in the late 1800s, did not have the same confidence.  They had seen too much and been the recipients of many broken promises and prejudices.

The Sixties changed America and the world.  A blog is not the place to rewrite an entire decade, and much of what happened outside of my home is a blur because teaching school (sometimes two shifts), working on my master's degree, and being a mom/housewife took all of my energy.  Sometimes I was overwhelmed.  My husband was a school superintendent in the southern suburbs, worked on his Ph.D at Northwestern in the northern suburbs, and we lived in the city.  It was tough for both of us, but worth every minute.

Central State Alumni Club picnic in the 60s

Easter was a big Day.  You dressed in your best.  Sons Corey and Cam with me.

My mother with four of her 10 brothers and sisters.  The aunt on the far right is still alive and well at 102.

David and his daddy in the '60s

The Moody Clan in Louisiana, late '60s for my husband's mother funeral.  He had six brothers and two sisters.

The 60s impacted the entire world.

• Africa awoke and 32 nations received their independence from colonialism.
• The first African America mayor of a major American city was elected.
• James Meredith registered at Ole Miss.
• Martin Luther King, Jr. won a Nobel Peace Prize.  He was the second African American to win it, Ralph Bunche in 1950 was the first.
• A wave of assassinations threaten to disrupt the movement.
• Thurgood Marshall was appointed to the Supreme Court.
• Sidney Poitier won an Oscar for Lilies of the Field.
• Bill Cosby starred in a TV series, I Spy.

The times were a-changing.

The Sixties - Part I

You must be the change you wish to see in the world. 

 ~Mahatma Ghandi

If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor.

Bishop Desmond Tutu

The 60s were a whirlwind, a time of tumultuous social, cultural, and political change.  The decade opened with optimism and ended with radical changes in every aspect of American life.  It was a decade of freedom riders, sit-ins, voting rights drives, demonstrations, the rise of the Kennedys, the horrific bombing of the Church in Birmingham, the War on Poverty, boycotts, feminism, space exploration and the murders of John, Bobby, Martin, and Malcolm.

Our first new house - 9544 S. Union - Chicago

During the sixties we moved into our first new home, (mortgage payment, including taxes, $118.00) had two more children, worked every day, earned my master's degree from the University of Chicago and my husband began work on his Ph.D at Northwestern.  He started teaching and by 1968 was the first Black Superintendent of Schools in Harvey, Illinois.  I taught in the Chicago Public Schools and by the end of the 60s was a multicultural consultant in the Park Forest, Illinois School District. We thought we would spend the rest of our life in Chicago and didn't have a clue that our stay in the Second City was coming to an end.

Our life settled into a comfortable rhythm. We were active in our alumni club and spent a considerable amount of time raising money for the college and encouraging young people to stay in school. We also became politically active because Chicago was Mayor Daley's town and politics was the way to get things done. 

I loved teaching, much more than administration where I spent most of my working years.  I had 52 students one year in an eighth grade class.  Our school was so crowded that we had to go on double shift. (8:00 a.m. - Noon and Noon - 4:00 p.m.)  Many days I taught both shifts and made double salary.  The school was one of the poorest in the city but the children were hungry to learn.  There were many gang bangers in my class but I never had a problem.  When they were planning a gang fight they were polite enough to notify us so that the students who weren't in gangs could get home before the fight. 

We had school parties at my home and some of the students would come out on the weekends to help me work in my garden.  Once I asked a group why they used their weekend that way and they told me that they liked working in the yard because after working they could take a bath.  (They didn't have a tub at home.)  Each class was offered a reunion party at my home when they finished high school and at one party only one of my eighth grade students was not graduating.  She was so impressed that she vowed to go back and complete high school.

Reunion at my house of eighth graders that I taught when they finished high school

The girl on the right in the maroon sweater became an editor at Essence Magazine.

The girl on the far left is the one who went back to finish high school.

Another former student, who is now a judge.  

We ran into each other in the Bahamas at a conference. 

Our segregated neighbor was very friendly and safe. There were a few white neighbors who refused to move no matter what the "blockbusters" offered them. We knew each other's life stories including the warts and successes, socialized together, and looked out for each other's children. We walked to the neighborhood park to watch the boys' baseball games, shoveled snow together to keep our street clear, shared food when someone didn't have any, and spent evenings on our porches where we gossiped, discussed daily happenings in the world, and made plans for the future.

We supported King when he came to Chicago, and sat up the night he was killed watching parts of the city burn. Could not understand the burning of the businesses that supported our community.  It was a very terrifying, violent time. It was frightening because no one could predict what would happen next, like the time I was entangled in one of the marches with King and thought I would be killed by the angry protesters.

We were shot at twice during the 60s.  The scariest one was the time we were driving with the boys to see my husband's family in Louisiana.  There were no hotels we could stay at along the way. The interstate system wasn't completed so much of the trip was on two lane roads.  We would pull into the woods to eat the food we had packed, to take naps, or to relieve ourselves as it was a very long trip with few facilities available for Blacks.  A truck load of white guys saw us in Mississippi and they had a truck load of rifles which they started using on us.  Luckily I was napping under the steering wheel and took off immediately, driving over 100 mph.  We did manage to escape.  It happened again in Cairo, Illinois so it wasn't just the South.  We called the North, up South.

Sometimes, a neighbor would light up a grill and other neighbors would rush into their homes to gather meat for an impromptu, communal bar-b-que. On one of those occasions when we went to get our meat, I looked out our front window before we returned, and saw an army car parked in front of the neighbor's home and two soldiers walking up to their front door.


"No." I screamed.  I knew immediately what they would say.  Our neighbor's son, Richard, the favorite child of the neighborhood, was killed in Vietnam.  We had a funeral to plan. 


All of a sudden Richard's father ran wailing out of his house.  The men in the neighborhood chased and caught him. A loud shriek from the house sent the women rushing to comfort his mother.  Waiting with his parents for his body to be returned was difficult and agonizing. To honor Richard we put flags in our yards and became anti-war zealots.


One poignant memory of the 60s involved a visit  we made to see a neighbor who was confined at a mental institution.  While we were visiting, I was surprised to see a friend from my high school dance class pirouetting down the hallway.  We were startled and taken aback when we saw each other, asking each other why was she in this place. 


An older, wise woman, who was quietly rocking in a rocking chair and was also a patient, glanced at us and made a pronouncement I've never forgotten.


"Well," she declared.  "Like I've always said.  You never know who you'll meet in the crazy house."  


What is you most memorable moment of the '60s?

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.  

~Mark Twain 


Madness need not be all breakdown.  It may also be break-through.  
~R.D. Laing, The Politics of Experience